I live in NJ where all gas stations are full service. Though I’m in a densely populated area with countless gas stations, I always go to the same one. There are two banks of pumps and I always go to bank furthest away from the convenience store. Why? Because the guy in charge of filling gas tanks on that side is one of the most powerful energizers I’ve encountered. Year after year, I leave with a smile on my face and lower blood pressure after only interacting with him for a few moments. His name is Sunny (really) and the only other thing I know is that he is from the Philippines. That fact neither here nor there as his home country ranks 52nd on in the 2020 World Happiness Report versus 18th for the United States.
This led me to reflect upon (and Google) the characteristics of people who add energy to others versus those who zap energy. Here is what I’ve put together so far.
| Attribute | Energizers | Vampires |
|---|---|---|
| Outlook | Silver Lining, hopeful, optimistic | Cloud, pessimistic |
| Focus | On others & in-the-moment | On themselves & distracted |
| Conversation goal | Learning | Telling |
| Face | Smiling | Neutral (or frowning) |
| Disposition | Open, candid, humble | Guarded, arrogant |
| Orientation | Giving, open | Manipulative, personal agenda |
| Quick to… | Praise | Criticize, complain, argue, blame |
| Memory | Remembers the ‘little details’ about others | “What’s your name again?” |
After writing this, I read a book called The Energy Bus that talks about Energizers and Vampires. Though I had not read the book before, I feel it is safe to assume that the comparison came into my mind because the book has entered the ‘zeitgeist’ and it was planted somewhere deep in my mind.